Monday, 19 September 2011

3 Years Of Blind Friendship - 1 night to throw it all away

I first started checking for guys just after I'd taken my last GCSE exam. GCSEs are like SATs but in the UK to take them when you are 16. When I first started out all I needed was the phone sex, I would get off on the fact I was not the only person who liked what I liked even in fantasy after years thinking I was alone in my state of mind.

Then along comes Michael. This guy and I were on this chatline with an option to have a 1 to 1 chat. So we send messages back and forth then I kick off the 1 to 1 chat request. He was the 1st guy black with a level head on his shoulder that I wanted to get to know outside of the chatline. He was 10 years older, but had a down to earth and funny character so I did. At the time I was too paranoid to meet him so we used to talk from dusk til dawn about life. I didn't want anyone that was 'down' to know me and see me.

I guess I had this twisted paranoia that every gay person was out to get me and back then life for me was very sheltered. I had no job so my parents knew all of my friends, I wasn't allowed out past 10.30pm on Weekdays and on weekends I had to be home by 12am. My mum was a neighbourhood celebrity who regularly had people from the area report back if they saw me on Oxford Street or around Ealing in general. You know in with all the gossips and that.

Michael was my telephone advice go to guy. The good thing about the friendship was the he lived in Birmingham so it added a so near but yet so far element to our dynamic. He was a call away when I got my 1st job, got into my 1st relationship and got accepted into university so we grew really tight. So this year was our third year of friendship. The sheltered life is now a distant memory as the respect point for keeping my head in the books had meant that parents had finally given me the green light to be my own man.

When university was out for the summer back in May I got a call from him saying that he'd be working in London at a conference for a week and asking whether I wanted to put a face to the voice by going to check him at the hotel he was staying at. Off of the fact that we got to know each other off of a chatline there was always chemistry, so I thought this was the last piece of the puzzle so why not?

Beep beep... the text alert on my phone sounds, I read it. ''Meet me at the Landmark hotel at 9pm. - M"

To be continued.... (Part 2 coming soon)

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